Saturday, August 21, 2010

Bitter effects of shyness..


There are so many people I would like to get to know. I'm sure they are all wonderful and exciting and have things to tell that would be amazing to listen to, but I rarely get to know people that well, or at all. I'm shy you see, so shy in fact that I can't really look anyone in the eye without getting all shaky, choking on my own breath or start making odd little noises.. I know, it's strange and all, but I don't think I'm alone in feeling that way.

Sometimes I feel scared to go out because I have to pass people in the street. It makes me nervous. If I meet a neighbor in the staircase I get all shaky. Social anxiety and it's bitter side-effects make me sad, but I have hopes that I'll get better someday. The worst part is that I often miss the chance to make friends because I'm too nervous to speak to them. I loose old friends because I don't dare to call them. I'm being honest now, I hope you won't judge, I think being honest is the best even though it shows things that aren't in my favor.

The friends I have I love dearly. I treasure them and I hope they know that. I think shyness often can be misunderstood as nonchalance and the fact that I'm often too scared to ask people questions can be interpreted as not being interested, but I am, I really am.

Today feels like a really good day though, and I am optimistic because I'm starting to actually do something about my shyness. I'll take small steps towards getting to know the people I'm curious about.

I'm curious about you! Who are you?

4 comments:

  1. hej, jag har läst några sidor i din blogg och jag kan verkligen känna igen mig själv i så mycket utav vad du skriver och berättar. dessutom gillar jag din stil så mycket. jag vet inte riktigt vad jag ska skriva mer än att jag verkligen beundrar dig och tror att vi hade kunnat vara vänner. nu känner jag mig jättedum, men jag ville bara säga det. :)

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  2. Du är inte jättedum i alla fall, jag skulle snarare säga att du är väldans snäll! :D Tack så mycket!

    Jag tror att det är väldigt vanligt att vara blyg, och att det också är vanligt att vara orolig och nervös så ofta och så mycket att man går miste om saker. Jag blev jätteglad för kommentaren, du får gärna maila mig om det är nåt annat du undrar eller så. Jag tycker om att maila som på den tiden då man hade brevvänner!

    emmywahlback @ gmail . com
    *kram*

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  3. Hello :)
    I stumbled across your blog today and just want to say how lovely and sweet it is :) this post in particular I can relate to and it's really nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like this, sometimes I feel so stupid for feeling like it but knowing I'm not the only person makes things a whole lot better.
    I don't know if you will even read this but I wish you all the best in your life because you seem like a truely lovely person and you deserve it :) x

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