Thursday, September 30, 2010

Sudden appreciation

There is frost on the ground outside and the morning sun is shining in on my face where I sit by my kitchen table and I feel a sudden appreciation of where I am, where I'm coming from. I just started to remember when my grandmother used to take me and my sister to see the runes and offering carvings on the stone hillsides in the forests not far away from where we lived. Where ancient people had drawn the shapes of ships and hunters into stone. We put little coins there at the very same place as the vikings made their offerings to the gods and a silly kid as I was I always asked the gods for candy and pretty dresses, but I was too small to appreciate it. I do now, when I realize that such things aren't common, and that the places I've lived have been places where people of old times have walked as well. They too experienced the first frost and when the sun gradually leaves Sweden as the earth turns. Soon I won't have morning sun on my face anymore. It will be pitch black..

I sometimes feel that I am boring, un-interesting and average. My family history as far back as it can be tracked have been Swedish farmers. I used to envy people I met with mixed heritages. I sometimes do still. It just seems so interesting to have family all over the world, or have a history and lineage from a country far far away. But I'm starting to realize that my background isn't average or boring, it's just mine and it seems that way because I've lived with it all my life.

I'll try to visit those runes again soon, or try to find new ones in the city I live in now. I'd much like to ask the ancient gods for other things than candy..

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