Saturday, July 31, 2010

I took a walk today..





Taking my camera out just to walk around on my own is not something I do often enough. It felt very relaxing, and I met a group of ducks! I thought that they'd be shy or scared but they came up to me quacking gleefully and the little ducklings came so close I could almost touch their little fluffy heads. I guess they thought I had some tasty breadcrumbs for them to chew on, but I don't care if they are only using me for food, I still see it as a friendly sign of affection that made me really happy! :)

I sat down on the grass near the pond for a while to just breathe and talk to the ducks and afterwards I came home and made a hot bowl of noodles. It almost feels like autumn today which is nice, but I don't want fall to come around just yet. I hate the winter and although autumn is nice, late summer is sweet and I wish to enjoy it some more before it disappears.

Now I think I'm gonna start reading a new book. It feels like a good thing to do. Today has been sweet so far.

Friday, July 30, 2010

My nest

Okay, so I'm now alone at home and I feel like a spooked kid, but also a kid who can run around the apartment singing, popping popcorn like crazy and watch whatever movies I like! Heaven! Not that I can't do that while J is home, but it feels a bit more adventurous when I know I'll be alone for so long. I've got lights lit all around though, the TV is on and I've built little "nests" of pillows, blankets and nice things to keep me company like books, movies, my sketchbook and of course my trusty macbook. I need these to feel comfortable. I'm not ashamed to admit I'm a bit scared of the dark, and my imagination can run away with me and spook me like BOO! I don't think I'm alone. I do feel a bit silly though that I make such a big deal out of this, but then again it is a really big deal to me. :) I think I might be blogging a lot this upcoming week unless I find some major distractions. I should make little plans for each day since I don't have anything planned right now. I think I'll try to create something each day. No matter how small. I should be able to do that. A photo, a sketch, a whole painting, who knows?!

Now I'm gonna choose what movie to watch and pop those popcorn, woo!

A tad bit scared


I'm going to be alone at home for over a week and I'm a tad bit scared about it. I'm not used to being alone, and a strange fact is that I've only ever spent one entire night alone at home ever in my own apartment. I like solitude and I enjoy just sitting on my bed, drawing, writing, sleeping, but I'm used to having someone come home every afternoon and someone to wake up next to every morning which makes me feel very safe. I'm afraid I might start scaring myself or be bored as hell or start feeling all confused and messed up, but I have hopes for this week as well! I hope that I will make it through out the week well and free from harm and that I will be able to be creative and happy! I drew the picture above and painted it this morning, it was a rush of happiness and excitement caused by some special comments and nice words in my DeviantArt-gallery that caused it I think. I'm happy with it but now I'm exhaused and my head is spinning. I'll lie down and read a bit and I will most likely fall asleep and sleep most of the day. Then I have to figure out what kind of food I want to eat this first evening of my week alone. A tad bit scary..

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Faeries and whatnot..


This is an old drawing of mine, but I still really like it. The girl has character somehow, it's not often that I feel that way about the girls I draw.

I'm finishing the book Valiant by Holly Black at the moment. I bought it yesterday in Stockholm along with some other books I can't wait to read. Valiant is a part of a series of books about fae-creatures living all over our world, concealed from us but sometimes revealed through tricks and their own desire to play games with humans. The first book in the series is called Tithe and I bought that book back when I was 16, the same age as the main character Kaye which I adore. I have read that book 5 times I think and each time I dream about faeries and the way that the world could be, how it would look if wild, scary but beautiful creatures danced around all over.

This drawing has some of the feeling I want to convey in a future fantasy project of mine that I hope to make reality of next term of school.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Waiting, I hate it!

My train leaves for Stockholm in about 40 minutes and I hate waiting for trains. It makes me all nervous and I keep staring at the clock to try to estimate when it's a reasonable time to leave for the train-station which is a 15 minute walk away if I'm really slow. I've been nervous for weeks about this although the trip in itself is really sweet! I hope to get to visit some great bookstores as well as a vintage shop I've been waiting to go to, but most of all of course I can't wait to meet my dear L! I'm guessing we'll be sitting at some café, eating muffins!

Okay, I've made some time pass. I'm gonna put my shoes on now and walk really slowly towards the train-station. Wohoo!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Mm, analog and instant!

I am wishing for an Instax Mini right now like crazy! I've been wanting a polaroid-camera since I was a kid but now I've found this little baby and it seems like a pretty sweet camera! Now, I have a really nice camera I got as a graduating gift which is awesome, but it's too perfect somehow, and I want that raw, analog feeling as well as instant satisfaction when it comes to actually holding the picture in my hand instead of fiddling with USB-cables and whatnot.. I was happy to discover that it wasn't very expensive either, but I still can't afford it right now. I'll definitely keep it in mind and save some money to get one of these in a hopefully near future though.

In other news, the failed painting from yesterday is still a fail, but I'll get over that silly thing. Tomorrow I'll be going to Stockholm to see a dear friend of mine from my WoW-playing days! I'll try to snap photos :)

*hugs*

Monday, July 26, 2010

Paint, paint, rest..

Okay, I just failed with a painting I've been working on since lunch and I've retreated to bed where I will now sulk for a while with my laptop and some sweet music..
If I'm lucky, the painting won't look as bad when I go into the kitchen to look at it again. *crossing fingers*

My goal was to create a nice fabric-print and paint a picture on top and then sew it onto the back of a jacket I have. It's just that I should have worked at a slower pace and stepped back to look at it once in a while. Now I ruined the whole darn thing with too much black!

Now then, complaining won't help one little bit, and if the painting looks half-decent I might snap a photo and share it with you. In a few days I'm sure I'll make a new attempt! Until then I'll rest and dream of trees.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

About enmi:

Helloes!

I want to tell you a bit about myself, but such a thing can be difficult, and I have thought quite a bit about how to do it without it feeling all weird and too much like a job-application. So I thought, an interview with myself perhaps? It might seem like a very self-obsessed thing to do, but then again, I don't think it's that bad.

I have taken some interesting questions from a great list.
So here I go..
How old are you?
I'm newly turned 22, but I still feel like a 12-year old somehow. Sometimes I feel panic when I think about aging, growing up has never been one of my main goals in life. Still life keeps on getting better and better, so I guess growing older isn't as dangerous as it might feel from time to time. I can still be 12 on the inside if I feel that way.

Where do you live?
In a small city in Sweden, in a cute little apartment that I really love because it feels like my first true home since I was a kid. This place is my own and it is where I keep everything I love. I am safe and I share it with someone I love. It's my biggest luxury and safety in life, no kidding! I love moving around though, so we'll see how long I can stay in one place.

What's your childhood dream?
I had millions! I was a dreamer, and I still am. I can't separate my childhood dreams from my current ones, because many things I dreamed of as a kid still remains. I wanted to be a princess in a castle with a hidden garden of roses and little ponds with fish in them. I wanted to live in the faerie-tales and be able to make my dreams come true in any way I could. Right now I dream of the day when a sneaky faerie-creature will knock on my window and tell me I'm a changeling and take me to join the world of folklore and tales with dragons, trolls and valiant knights. I haven't gotten to fulfill those dreams yet, but I do my best by playing role playing games, reading books and I try to bring some of those dreams into what I create whenever I can.

Picture yourself in 5 years from now:
I hope I'm running my own little business selling artwork and other things I've created. I picture myself in a cute little home-studio, still living happily with my husband and I'll have a cat or two because my allergies will be gone. Maybe I'll have a kid? O_O Who knows?!

What makes you smile?
Animals, they just fill me with so much happiness it would get all cheesy if I tried to describe it. I smile when I find really beautiful and inspirational pictures in magazines, on blogs or on tv. I smile when I see my little sister, and when I dream and tell my husband about all the imaginary pets I dream up. We have one panda, two turtles, a nasty bunny and a polar bear at home. They make me smile a lot!

....

I'm happy I found that list of questions, many of them are really difficult but It would be really interesting to answer them all at some point. I'd love to know who you are, because I'm curious to see if there is anyone actually reading what I'm writing or not ^.^ Maybe you have a blog yourself and want to answer some of these questions? I dunno, everyone should interview themselves at some point. I'd love to know more about you.

*hugs*

Watercolor

Yesterday I found two new shades of watercolor which my husband bought me as a late birthday-present/wedding-day gift. We have been married for one year now, we celebrated our own way, eating tasty foods and loads of chocolate ice-cream with marshmallows!

But anyway, watercolor. I found a perfect shade of pink and a nice green/yellow color that I think will look amazing. Tomorrow I think I'll try them out in my journal if I'm in the right mood. I'm also thinking about trying to paint some acrylic stuff. I haven't really dared to paint traditionally before except some experiments here and there, but I think I'm starting to get to a point where I understand how to think while trying new things. Accepting that not everything has to be perfect all the time, and if the colors look all messed up or the lines get wobbly, then maybe that's a part of the beautiful thing about using a brush upon a canvas. It's not digital perfection, it's not supposed to be, and I'm starting to like it.

Today however is a rainy sunday, and I'm tired and lazy, and that's ok too!

*hugs*

Friday, July 23, 2010

My stuff


I've been dreaming and thinking a lot about what I want to do in the future, how I want to develop myself, learn new stuff and turn all these things I love into something I can make a living out of when I grow up..

I'm not all there yet, but in a not so distant future I will probably start selling some things of mine in my newly opened Etsy-shop. When that time comes I will feature it here of course. I'm just so happy and excited about it! All the little ideas swimming around in my head, just waiting to be picked up and made into reality somehow.

However, I promised myself and those close to me that I will take it easy this summer, no stress and no musts.. That way I will recover faster and better and eventually be able to do all those things I dream about. Patience is key I guess..

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Messy pages


These are the first pages of my art journal project. It's been a lot of fun, and I've been greatly inspired by the wonderful artist Anahata Katkin. Her journals look amazing and It's been really exciting to try out some tecniques that are all new to me!

With this project I aim to create and have fun in ways that are new and interesting to me. At the same time I get a diary, a book to look through with images and little notes about my days. I think it will be really nice to look though this diary when I sit there, older and wiser somewhere in the future. I think I've missed this feeling of holding in a piece of art that I've created ever since I started to draw and paint all digitally. I love digital art, but right now I enjoy a break from my wacom-tablet and photoshop. I've traded my digital tools for cheap brushes and old watercolors and cut-outs from old magazines for a while. It's refreshing and I hope I will be able to keep on doing this for a while. :)

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Pink sugar raspberry cookies!


Amazingly sweet and simple cookies. They were baked on a whim and now rest in my cookie-jar. Some were eaten on the spot though, they are difficult to resist. Photographing food is great fun, I'll try to do it more often. :)

Bittersweet days..

Gosh I'm so tired right now. It's been a wonderful and horrible week at the same time. I got a puppy, had to return her to her previous home, tears and tears, but a lot of joy too, and now I'm exhausted and without Juno. It's sad, but it was for the best..

My plan for today is to just relax and not beat myself up too bad about stuff. Maybe I'll have some energy to bake or create? If not, well, whatever.. I have bags full of crafts-supplies that are just waiting to be turned into cute things and if I decide to drink tea or sleep all day then they won't be any less inspiring tomorrow.

The picture in this post is one of me and a cute goat girl I met this summer. I love animals in general, and I wish I could bring them all home, but at the same time Its kind of a relief to be able to just close my door, take a deep breath and be alone for a while.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Muffins


A simple muffin is sadly underestimated. Vanilla-flavored goodness and so easy to make! Me and my friend G made some today with the cute cupcake-cases she got me as a birthday present! They were oh so sweet. I love to bake, it makes me calm somehow, and it's a kind of creativity that doesn't come with any high expectations, and I only bake simple stuff. Tomorrow I'll try to complete a little project of mine. Experimental and a lot of fun. :)

Creativity, happiness and a puppy!

Okay, here we go.. I'm enmi and this will be the place where I post random creativity by me and others as well as little details and stuff from my life. Nothing too fancy or strange, just me trying to find a place to gather everything that I want to share.

Today is a special day. It's the first whole day with my puppydog Juno. Me and J, my husband went to pick her up yesterday, and I'm completely in love with her. I've never had a dog before, and it's all very new and exciting.

In other news I've started to slowly create and be happy about it again after a long time of being sad on various ways. It's a slow and kind of bumpy road back to the childish excitement I used to feel about drawing, sewing and painting a few years ago. I'll walk it step by step and see where it leads and I'll share some of my experiences, sources of inspiration and my own work in this bittersweet blog. Today is sweet..