Monday, January 14, 2013

Bubblegum

I took the final step to finish my makeover from subtle gray lump to the real enmi as I've always wanted to be. It feels way more like me now and I love it. I dyed half my hair bubblegum pink and I smile every time I see it. It's a semi-permanent dye and when it washes out I'll try turquoise. It's really nice to be able to change little things and experiment with looks.

I'm a bit annoyed though, because when I uploaded this pic on DA and wrote about the reasons why I'm so happy right now and how this change is a result of that, some people commented that it sort of appeared as if I was fishing for compliments. I mean, compliments are really nice! That's not why I wanted to show this to people however. I want to inspire other people to experiment with their looks too because I think it's awfully common that people hinder themselves thinking that they can't pull it off or that they are too "boring" or "old" to play around like that. I've felt that way too and really, nobody can look down on you as much as you can look down on yourself. I've done that for years and now I've stopped completely.

I honestly believe that moods are contagious. I think I've been spreading some sort of gloom to those close to me by always being so tired and sad. I couldn't really help it though but I managed to pull through somehow. People I've known for years comment on my behaviour and looks now, being really positive. They obviously notice the change, and I don't mean my appearance. People I talk to on the phone even notice my voice sounds different. I love hearing this since I can feel it too. I want to spread this wonderful feeling I have to others. Another girl commented on my DA that she wished she could have that confidence too and my reply is that you shouldn't try or wish for it. Just do it. Everyone has the power to change themselves. Not to switch personality in order to please anyone else, quite the opposite. Be exactly who you want to be, because that is probably your real true self! I've never felt more like myself than now even though I've changed completely. This is me. I want to see you! Step out of your closet and wear what you want to wear! BE FREE!

Haha, okay, I'm quite over the top now, but I'm serious too. Free yourself from self-doubt and such shit. You can do it! Just throw it out a window and never look at it again.

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